Tuesday Talent: Bana, Rhys Meyers and Thomas Jane

The portrait of the 18 year old Henry Tudor at his coronation belies the colourful, fascinating and monstrous monarch he was to become and with whom there seems to be endless fascination. It is Eric Bana who portrays Henry VIII in his latest depiction in the film The Other Boleyn Girl. It’s hoped that this is at least a cut above Showtime’s The Tudors.



Last year TV Critic, Melanie McFarland had this to say:

*Playing an outsize historical figure like this requires an actor who blows the role open, making his delivery reach out and grab you by the neck. Helen Mirren and Jeremy Irons set the standard in Elizabeth I, last year's other, better, Tudor-related piece.

Rhys Meyers doesn't even compare. No one in the cast does, not even Sam Neill, who plays the two-faced Cardinal Wolsey, or Jeremy Northam as king's counsel Sir Thomas More. Anne Boleyn, one of the feistiest women of that era (Natalie Dormer), isn't much more than a girl with shiny hair, devastating eyes and a weirdly lopsided smile. That's enough to get her work in a Suave commercial, not in a heavy-duty historical series.



It's unfair to lay every fault on the actors when the dialogue is so insubstantial, verging on sophomoric and mawkish in a few exchanges. This really doesn't help The Tudors' heavy reliance on court intrigue. Court politics, no matter how complex, are dull to witness unless presented by performers who can spice up each declaration and maneuver with sparks and fire, spurred on by devastating turns of phrase to play with. Lacking those spices -- well, you get this, a jewel made of paste.



The Tudors' blunted performances would be easier to withstand if we could empathize with any of these characters. Yet there's not a single Everyman among these people, nobody with whom the commoners watching at home can connect. That is one thing Rome, with all its violence, gore and uneven appeal, was careful to provide, and it was enough to carry the series through two seasons.

In contrast, Henry's is a castle full of snotty jerks with a shrill, impish egomaniac at the center. Good luck trying to spend 10 hours with him and his lords- and ladies-in-waiting.

Lastly, aside from the major events, there's no reason to discuss the historical accuracy of The Tudors in detail, beyond saying that high school kids should not crib from it to write their papers. There's so much wrong with The Tudors that it's tough to figure out whom, exactly, it aims to seduce. The eye candy quickly loses its tang.

Anglophiles will scoff at the sloppiness with historical detail. Anyone else is going to be confused at why they're not seeing someone like Oliver Platt play Henry VIII as the mutton-chomping, ale-swilling despot with whom we're familiar. Compared to Rhys Meyers in The Tudors, it seems that the fat guy had more fun. Maybe Showtime would have been better off going with him.**



Henry VIII didn't become that "fat guy" until in his 40s when he became unable to engage in his many athletic activities. In his youth he was quite the image of male pulchritude. Quotes from the era--



“His Majesty is the hansomest potentate I ever set eyes on; above the usual height, with an extremely fine calf to his leg, his complextion fair and bright, with auburn hair, combed straight and short in the French fashion, and a round face so very beautiful that it would become a pretty woman, his throat was rather long and thick"


"He is very fond of hunting, and never takes his diversion without tiring eight or ten horses which he causes to be stationed beforehand along the line of country he means to take, and when one is tired he mounts another, and before he gets home they are all exhausted. He is extremely fond of tennis, at which game it is the prettiest thing in the world to see him play, his fair skin glowing through a shirt of the finest texture."

Perhaps Showtime was aiming for that image of the oft-married king in casting Rhys Meyers, who is, if nothing else, sensually gorgeous as is Bana. The story of the Tudors is very important and specifically that of Henry VIII who set much in motion at the onset of the Modern Era.

There have been many magnificent portrayals of King Harry and there will continue to be. He was lusty and powerful and something of a monster. In the future might we suggest as a possibility an actor who can easily portray the man in all aspects, Thomas Jane.